he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
