Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize