i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
