just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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