But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
