Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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