Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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