At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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