You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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