You're completely useless in the revolution.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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