i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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