I puked a lego.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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