He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
