and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
