I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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