everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Randomize
