So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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