glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
