I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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