She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Boobs are out for the taking
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Please don't give away my fajitas
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
