How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Randomize
