He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
