I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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