the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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