I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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