Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I lost the right to judge tonight
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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