I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
