the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
