does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize