she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
