My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize