question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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