So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
