why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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