she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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