I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
