dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
