You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
No more Irish car bombs ever.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Randomize
