Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
