sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
