I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Me too!
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize
