Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
