i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize