hell yes lets make some ravioli
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
We need to rekindle our bromance
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize