I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
You smell like a Billy Joel song
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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