Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
