Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
