It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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