Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
