so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
