So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
My dick has a subreddit
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
